Knottie's Niche» US Army

One Step Left

Knottie — Sat, 02 Apr 2011 00:44:24 +0000

If you have followed my blog for anytime you know about the “sign” that was made in Iraq by the LT of the engineering team Micheal had been escorting that day. That sign was hung on the FOB barracks in Memory of Micheal in April 2008 and when the guys came home I knew that a new group of Micheal’s Brothers were going t walk beneath that sign daily and remember him also.

About a year and a half ago I got the burr to bring the sign home. I would soon find out my son’s LT had already made the arrangements and in fact the sign was in the US at Ft Riley. The FOB it once was on had been dismantled and the Iraqis had taken control of the security in that area.. a success. ( BTW the Iraqi’s took over the JSS one year to the day after my son was killed. )

I then began the next step of the mission of getting the sign home to the 1-502^nd and my son’s military family. It was not made for me but for his brothers and as much as it honors him it honors them also. About a year ago the sign got to Bravo Co with the help of a 1SG and Col. and a very very kind CSM.

At that point the sign was entrusted to Micheal’s Platoon Leader Sgt. Les Fuller. Sgt. Fuller took it home and began the job of staining and polyurethane coating the sign to preserve it. Well today sgt Fuller finished the work on the sign. And it is GORGEOUS.. He and LT Watrin have truly honored my son.

Now we have one step left in the journey of this memorial to my son.. to get the barracks at Ft Campbell named for my son and the sign hung. No that is not true.. two steps are left.. I need to touch this sign.. I need to run my fingers along the letters. Then we can hang it and name a barracks.

It Saddens Me Greatly

Knottie — Wed, 17 Nov 2010 04:21:49 +0000

On Nov.4^th 2010 Sgt. Jason James McCluskey gave his life in the line of duty. He was 26 years old. On Nov.13^th, 2010 his family and friends gathered to say their final farewells to him. His funeral should have been solemn occasion…It should have been a send off done with honor and dignity. But Westboro Baptist church showed up to protest and the counter protesters came to “protect” the family. The tires of Westboro Baptist church’s van were slashed, motorcycles revved to drown out the chants of WBC and Sgt McCluskey’s dignified farewell was turned into a protest war zone. And that saddens me greatly.. for him, for his family and for America.

Over the past few days I have read and heard great glee from people about the counter protest..But when I asked these people what was the soldier’s name they can’t answer… You see Sgt McCluskey was forgotten and lost in it all. It became a “Look what we did” travesty.

I’ve been the family who had to worry and wonder if the lunatics from Westboro would show up. (And yes they did show up but my town had an ordinance that required a protest permit 14 days in advance and they did not get perform their abuse on my family. It also lead them to find a State law around all similar local ordinances. ) I now wonder if the counter protesters behavior is any better. There is a core of people in these groups who understand that this is not a battle or a show it is about allowing the families to grieve in private and with dignity. But there is now a much larger element whom are just there to react to these lunatics. And in their reaction to Westboro Baptist Church they behave no better.

It’s shameful to have allow this young heroes funeral to become such a circus of bad behavior. So I am asking those who set out to “protect” the families of our Fallen Heroes in the future.. please ask yourself if you are responding in a dignified and honorable manner or are you just being the same kind of attention whore as Westboro Baptist church?

Rest in Peace Jason James McCluskey.. Take luck my Soldier son.. Someone remembers, Someone cares, Someone whispers your name in their prayers

Veteran’s Day.. A Civics Lesson

Knottie — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 02:33:27 +0000

In the United States we have 3 National holidays that celebrate our military. Unfortunately it seems most people either don’t know anything about them or they get them all mixed up and push them together. Ok so here is a civics lesson

Memorial Day is the last Monday in May every year. This is the day we remember those who made the ultimate sacrifice and gave their life for this nation in the face of an enemy. This is a day of mourning and remembrance. For far too many it’s the welcoming of summer, a long weekend and a chance to drink beer and bbq. But for many they do take a moment to remember and recognize the Fallen.

Armed Forces day is the 2^nd Saturday of May. This is the day we THANK those currently serving. It’s a chance to shake the hand of a man or woman in uniform and thank them for the job they doing.

Veterans Day is Nov 11^th every year. It’s a day to thank those who served and came home. It a day to embrace them and say we are glad you came home and job well done. As the mother of a fallen soldier I want this one day to be happy and celebrate my son’s brother who came home. To be happy that these men are here and to thank them and all those who have served and came home. This is not a sad day.. it’s a day of gratitude and celebration.

What people do not seem to understand, when they center us Gold Star Families out on Veterans day, is that they are taking a moment from those who served and came home and from us. A Moment that we want to celebrate others not mourn our own. Yes, we want our sons and daughters remembered but for this one day we want our Veterans celebrated and we want to sit quietly in the back ground and just take in the celebration of gratitude towards these men and women who wore the uniform, protected this nation and came home to carry on. Leave the mourning of our sons and daughters who are Fallen for Memorial day and the rest of the year.. but for today ..Veterans Day… honor them by focusing your full attention and gratitude to their brothers and sisters in arms who came home.

Thank you Veterans.. I am glad you are home..

RIP David H McNerney

Knottie — Wed, 13 Oct 2010 01:26:25 +0000

A little over two years ago I was invited to spend some time visiting with a group of America’s finest.. Medal of Honor recipients. One of those men was David H McNerney

This is his story

David H McNerney was serving his third tour in Vietnam on 22 Mar 1967. While looking for a missing reconnaissance unit near Polei Doc, Vietnam, his unit came under heavy fire from a numerically-superior North Vietnamese Army. His officers were killed, so McNerney took command, calling in artillery withing 65 feet of his own men. The fighting was so intense that McNerney climbed a tree in full view of the enemy in order to identify their location to friendly aircraft. When helicopters were needed to evacuate the wounded, McNerney moved through a fusillade of fire to obtain demolition charges from abandoned rucksacks outside the perimeter.

McNerney would later volunteer for another tour – his fourth. (source)

Tonight I found out he has passed away. I will never forget meeting this hero. Be blessed Sir. It was certainly a true honor to know you.

Signing my MoH book earlier this year

Who Knew… 3 Years

Knottie — Fri, 08 Oct 2010 15:47:35 +0000

You can listen to some songs a 1000 times and then one day they hit you with a whole new meaning. I’ve mentioned this before but again it has happened to me.

While driving the song “Who Knew” by Pink came on the radio. “if someone said three years from now you’d be long gone I would stand up and punch them out cause their all wrong. Who knew..” “Count your blessings now before their all gone” and it hit me.

Three years ago today I hugged my son goodbye. It has been three years and it seems like only last week and forever ago we stood there him telling me not to cry he would be fine. And in that moment if anyone would have said in three years he would be gone from me I would have punched them out. I want that moment back so much. Not just for me but for my whole family. For Micheal.

Today I am trying to celebrate the times we had with Micheal. The laughter and joy he brought to our lives. I’m trying not to let the missing him overwhelm me. And as always he has orchestrated life to help me. Yesterday the Barracks sign made it home to his Strike family. It has taken almost two years but it’s where it belongs now. It’s as if the last piece of him is finally at peace and home.

“An Ugly Pair of Shoes”

Knottie — Mon, 06 Sep 2010 18:31:51 +0000

“An Ugly Pair of Shoes”

I am wearing a pair of shoes.
They are ugly shoes.
Uncomfortable Shoes.
I hate my shoes.
Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair.
Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step.
Yet, I continue to wear them.
I get funny looks wearing these shoes.
They are looks of sympathy.
I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs.
They never talk about my shoes.
To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable.
To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them.
But, once you put them on, you can never take them off.
I now realize that I am not the only one who wears these shoes.
There are many pairs in the world.
Some women are like me and ache daily as they try and walk in them.
Some have learned how to walk in them so they don’t hurt quite as much.
Some have worn the shoes so long that days will go by
before they think of how much they hurt.
No woman deserves to wear these shoes.
Yet, because of the shoes I am a stronger woman.
These shoes have given me the strength to face anything.
They have made me who I am.
I will forever walk in the shoes of a woman who has lost a child.

Author Unknown

Pokey and the Packers…

Knottie — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 01:24:08 +0000

Sitting here watching the Green Bay Packers play I can’t help but think about Micheal. The last night we spent with Micheal we watched the Packers play. Oct.7^th 2007 They played the Bears.. I can’t remember who won. I just remember he and his Dad and his brothers in my dad’s living room on the edge of the couch watching the game.

Many months later his team Leader Sgt W would tell me that during playoff in Jan. 08 he was up in the middle of the night alone watching TV..

“Hey Phillips, why aren’t you sleeping?”

“It’s the Packers”

As if that explained everything.

I laughed when the story was told me. I can see him alone in the TV room at the FOB in Iraq watching the playoff game.. yelling at the play. Micheal was such a huge Packer fan. I guess that comes from the years of living in Green Bay just a few blocks from Lambeau field. And I am sure watching them play was a connection to home for him.

Honestly there is not much in life that doesn’t in some way bring back a memory or remind me of Micheal but certain things really open the flood gates of emotions and make the emptiness and missing him palatable. Most of the time I can watch the Packers and be ok. Tonight however I miss Micheal very much. I wish he was here with me yelling at the TV and cheering the Packers on.

In an odd way watching the Packers play is a small connection to Micheal no one can ever take from me. Someday I will go back to Green Bay and watch the Packers play live. Not sure how but when I do I will find a way to honor Micheal and leave his mark on Lambeau field.

Go Pack Go.

Footnote:

It just occurred to me.. I am going to ask the Packers to all wear a rubberband on their wrist in memory of Pokey and all his Fallen brothers during one game this season.

They’re Here (Updated)

Knottie — Sun, 18 Jul 2010 02:06:18 +0000

You may read this and think I am insane or that the grief has finally pushed me over the edge but I feel I have to share this story.

Last night through the men and families of the Company my son served with and I have adopted as my extended family I found out we had lost two of ours. I will not post the names yet as the Dept. of Defense hasn’t made those names public. I wouldn’t discuss their death except I know the families have been officially notified.

To say this news upset me is an understatement. My heart broke at the news, for those two men, for their families, for their brothers in arms and for this nation. Having heard this news through the Army family grapevine I prayed it was a rumor that the news was exaggerated. I held on to hope they were only injured. Well this morning I read that 5 NATO troops had been killed in Afghanistan yesterday, two of them US Army. This news report and word from those in the company in Afghanistan confirmed what I knew.

I read this news on the AP wire and walked away from my computer to accept it. As soon as had I stepped away from the computer having read this I heard Micheal’s voice clearly say “They’re here.” It wasn’t a whisper, it wasn’t sad, it was comforting. Like when you have lost your child in a crowd and someone says those words that calm you, “They’re here”. And I knew they were with him. There was a certain peace in the words. He was telling me they were safe and at peace with him now. On Army Guardian Angel duty.

Am I crazy? Maybe. Maybe I just so needed to hear it I did. Doesn’t matter… All I know for sure is they are there… where ever there is.

I will update this with a proper tribute to the two men as soon as DoD officially releases their names. In the meantime… send comfort to their families and honor them by taking care of their brothers still fighting in Afghanistan.

http://www.defense.gov/releases/release.aspx?releaseid=13722

The Department of Defense announced today the deaths of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Enduring Freedom.

They died July 15 in Kandahar, Afghanistan, of wounds sustained when enemy forces attacked their unit with an improvised explosive device. They were assigned to the 1st Battalion, 502nd Infantry Regiment, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 101st Airborne Division (Air Assault), Fort Campbell, Ky.

Killed were:

Sgt. 1st Class John H. Jarrell, 32, of Brunson, S.C.

Sgt. Leston M. Winters, 30, of Sour Lake, Texas.

Take Luck Harding…I Miss You Son

Knottie — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 03:23:29 +0000

A few days after Micheal was killed we got a call from Iraq.. I knew the number was from Iraq I had spent the last months waiting for that 1191 to show up on my phone. I had to ask 3 times for the young man’s name. He was obviously emotional, PFC Mark Harding was on the other end. I knew the name. Micheal had mentioned him often. He was one of the three amigos. Fagan, Harding and Phillips.. the morale team. Self appointed. We spoke for some time. Both of us cried together both of us searched for the answer to why that day. He became my son that day.

Mark was one of the first to come to our home. He came for New Years 2009. My son David didn’t want to meet any of the guys. But he and Mark hit it off. You see Mark was one of those people you just had to love. I remember sitting with Mark at Ihop eating breakfast and having a conversation no 19 yr old kid should be having. I remember thinking his heart was too caring for infantry. He had so much love.

I have videos of Mark goofing off with my son and the other guys. I have pictures of his beautiful smile. I have cried with this young man. Laughed with him and sat in silence with him. He would call me and tell me about where he was in life. He had gotten out of the Army and had some difficulty adjusting back to civilian life. Just like most of the guys do. Last time I talked to him he was working and happy. Moving forward and living again.

Saturday may 30th 2010 just 15 days after his 21st birthday Mark was removed from life support. He had survived combat in Iraq, survived the demons of coming home only to sub come to a sinus infection. His family made the most difficult decision any family has ever faced. In his death he has saved the life of 7 people through organ donations.

When news came it spread quickly among his Army brothers. No one wanted to believe it. Everyone was heartbroken. Mark was the youngest and they all were protective of him but they also respected him. His brothers rallied and began to gather their pictures to share with the family. Others volunteered to gather a proper Class A uniform for him to be buried in and drive 14 hours to make sure it was there in time. Mark was that loved and respected.
I have lost another son.. my heart aches. Mark touched my heart. I am trying to find comfort in knowing that he missed Micheal as much as I do and that they are together. Heaven has two very special angels.. both my sons.

Take Luck Harding.. I love you. Hug Pokey for me.. and save me a place at the campfire.

How can you not love that smile?

Enjoy Your Vacation Mr. President

Knottie — Wed, 26 May 2010 01:29:53 +0000

Memorial Day is next Monday. It is a day to remember and honor those who have given the ultimate sacrifice in service of this nation. It is tradition that a wreath is laid at the memorial in Arlington each year .

I started quite the rant earlier this evening about how Pres. Obama is not going to be laying the wreath at Arlington on Memorial Day so he can go to Chicago and have a vacation.

I was infuriated when I read Pres. Obama was going to a family get together rather than Honor our Fallen as Commander and Chief. My first thought was “unforgivable”. Now I know he will not be the first President to not attend the wreath laying. But others had reasons that were not “vacations”. Then I thought about Pres. Obama’s treatment of our troops and it occurred to me that if he does lay the wreath it will be play acting as he has no gratitude for those who it is laid in Honor of. It would be fake and I don’t want that wreath laid for my son and his brothers and sisters by someone who so obviously despises everything my son stood for and died for.

Pres. Obama’s loathing of our troops has been evident from the very beginning of his presidency when he was the First President to skip the Inauguration night ball Honoring Medal of Honor Recipients in over 50 years. Then there was his punishment of Gen. Stanly McChyrstal for publicly outing the fact he had ignored our Military commanders request for more troops in Afghanistan by making them wait months for an answer which was simple. That cost more lives than we probably know. Then there is the treasonous Rules of Engagement imposed on our troops.

It would be the greats Honor of my life to lay that wreath. I would be humbled to simply attend the service. But you see I love those men. I may not know their names but I know them. They are my son’s brothers and they stood and died for the same Love of Nation he did.

Enjoy your vacation Mr. President. Someday I hope you realize you are free to do so because of the men you refuse to honor.In the meantime I am glad someone with an ounce of respect for our troops is laying the Wreath at Arlington this Memorial Day.

THANK YOU to those who lay in peace now.. Thank you so very much my dear sons and daughters